Saturday, April 19, 2014

A bump in the road

Thank you so much for your wonderful comments.

This week managed to throw us a curve. My sister, Mom and I went to Nashville on Wednesday to be rested before the all day long surgery. We had to be at the hospital at 8 AM and we had a 2-1/2 wait before they called Mom. My sister went up with her as they would only allow one person to be with her in pre-op and that person had to stay until she went into surgery. I got a text from my sister telling me they were taking her to get a CT scan to see exactly where the tumor was now. A little while later, I got another text that they weren't going to do the surgery. It seems the tumor has grown too large and was too close to some vital areas to safely do the surgery.  They would be taking her back to Dr. Mannion's office, the ENT surgeon, to do a biopsy to see exactly what they were dealing with. Apparently, our local hospital, pathology, whatever, never sent any slides to them from the original biopsy.

Stacey came back downstairs and we went to the doctor's office. I sent Stacey back to be with Mom. I was so disappointed and scared and angry and everything else, I just couldn't see Mom at that point. I had a cry, talked with my husband and waited on my daughter and James. When the nurse brought her out, they told us to go home. The plan is to do chemo to hopefuly shrink the tumor to a more manageable size for surgery and we can do that closer to home.

My aunt and cousin had come down to be with us during the surgery. My Mom lives with this aunt and they are really close. They had gotten a room for the night because my aunt did not want to leave until she was able to see Mom so they asked Mom and I to stay with them and then go home on Friday. Mom was totally worn out and very disappointed so we said okay. My sister had planned to go home Thursday night anyway so she went ahead.

I know this reads like a jumble of words but right now I'm not thinking very clearly. I'm very worried that they have left it too late and there won't be anything they can do. I told my Mom at the very beginning that I would accept any decision she made and that the decisions were hers. I am so afraid I'm going to lose my Mom to this and that she will be in pain. I don't want to lose her but I really don't want her to be in pain.

I have slept off and on all day but now I'm working through my emotions so I don't know if I'll sleep tonight. Please keep remembering us. As my sister said, we are in for a long haul. We are lucky to have each other and the family support. My daughter has been wonderful through all of this and so has her husband. My son is staying in touch and talking to me and Mom. Mom has 3 sisters who will do anything for her. Family is so important at a time like this and I am so thankful for the family we have.

Thank you for stopping by.

Hugs,
Sharon

8 comments:

  1. So very sorry to hear that this is dragging out for you and your family. It must be a really miserable time for you all. I'm sure you are doing your very best to keep as positive as possible. Sending my strongest strongest vibes to you Sharon ...believe me I've been through this I know so I wish I could help in some way. I can but keep you in my thoughts dear!
    Keep strong!!!

    fondest regards

    Amanda xx

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  2. It's such a worrying and stressful time for you all, but I'm sure the doctors know what they're doing. Shrinking a tumour with chemo before surgery is quite common so try not to worry that things have been left too late, I'm sure they're just taking the safest and best option for your mum. Having to travel all that way and prepare yourself for the surgery will have taken it's toll on your emotions so I can understand how upset, worried and stressed you are. Just try to keep strong for your mum and look after yourself as you won't be much good to anyone if you don't. Sending my very best wishes to you all.

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  3. So sorry to hear of this change of events. It's tough to know the right thing to do and a very trying time for all involved. A shame the doctors didn't have more contact as the surgery was being scheduled. One of our young teachers is back in the States because she found out she had a brain tumor. Her surgery was scheduled for a week or so ago, but since we are on Spring Break, I'm not sure how things turned out. We go back tomorrow will know more. I will keep you and your mom and family in my thoughts and prayers. Best wishes and blessings, Tammy

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  4. Oh, please forgive me for being so long gone and not knowing what is happening. Sending so much love and care, E.

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  5. Oh I'm so sorry for this disappointing news for your Mom, and the entire family. It does seem as though the doctors could have done a better job of communicating. I will continue to be in prayer for you all. It is so hard to see your Mom going through any kind of serious illness. Many of us have been there and have an idea of the feelings and maybe even terror you're feeling. May God give you comfort and peace right now as even more decisions are being made,
    Blessings,
    Betsy

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  6. It is really good to have family support in these difficult times. I hope it all works out well for your mum and that she has the strength to get through the difficult days ahead.

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  7. Oh gosh, Sharon, I've been wondering all week how it went - and have been so behind on blogreading that I missed your post.

    So sorry you all were disappointed in your hopes of getting the surgery done. It's very hard indeed to have prepared yourselves emotionally and then to have the plans change at the last minute. How frustrating for everyone.

    I hope the new plan of treatment will work out even better for your mom. Hang in there, dear friend. Will keep you all in my prayers. Sending you another big virtual hug.

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  8. Oh, dear Sharon. I am so sorry for what you all are facing, but so glad that you part of a loving caring family. Love with hugs, from Gracie

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